Ok GO!

So I am feeling much better. Not so down in the dumps and inexplicably angry. My friend Karl has started a website (blog?) that I thoroughly enjoy and it has made me want to start writing fiction again, but I have been feeling thoroughly uncreative these past months.

I've made a promise to myself to finish the papercut of my giant head tomorrow. The boy will be out doing his thing, and I dont have any plans, so I am going to sit down with a couple razors and knock that baby out of the park.I feel I need to complete something, before I start spiraling into a pit of self doubt again.

I am not the worlds most self confident person, but I am  confident enough to realize I am pretty damn good at some things, even though Social Decorum prevents me from tooting my own horn too loud. But sometimes, I get into moods where I'm so sad just cant stand myself and I cant believe that anything I do is worth it. I hate these moods and I hate the fact that I have been fighting them since I hit puberty.  So please, if you my imaginary readers catch me in one of these, disregard it as temporary insanity, and know that this too shall pass.

so, right now, I feel like writing, or drawing or painting, I feel like creating something. only I have nothing thats particularly moving me today. So here I am babbling for the sake of babbling, I used to be much better at this whole stream of conciousness thing... I guess I've installed a brain filter soemwhere along the line.

maybe later i will try for five solid minutes of whatever pops in my head.